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I Love Failure

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TAKING RISKS

11/27/2012

15 Comments

 
After a year of dating, I asked Nesrin to marry me. 
She looked at me, held my hand and replied… NO, thank you!

A slow minute of silence past by and then she began to explain her reason… “The moment we get married, you will stop taking risks.  You will feel that you are responsible for my wellbeing and you will think twice before taking a risk! This is normal as it happens to everyone once they get married.”

Risk is defined in the dictionary as the possibility that something unpleasant or unwelcome will happen. In reality, everything that one does in their life requires a certain amount of risk! To learn to ride a bike, taking exams at school, accepting a new job or even asking someone for a date, all require a form of risk taking. You could fall, get an F, get fired or better, could be rejected and stay home alone. The key is to learn, adjust and move to the next challenge!

As a young man, I was constantly involved in different projects, creating ideas and searching for opportunities. I was very focused on my dreams, taking risks for personal or financial growth. After high school, I left the comfort of my home in Ecuador and traveled to the USA looking for a purpose. I arrived in Gainesville, Florida with a limited English and very little cash.  I worked as a laborer, baker, door-to-door salesman, while paying my way through school. In college I was among the founders of a fraternity, created a magazine and built a student discount card. Always taking chances and many times failing.  The most important thing was that I did not surrender and I aspired for better. At night I could not sleep thinking what is next, how can I stay ahead of the pack.

We all have dreams, we all want to be musicians, dancers, writers, politicians, and so on… but only a few are willing to take the risks. The majority are afraid of failing. Making mistakes is part of life and growing up.  Mistakes are what we call experience! If you are not failing it is because you are not risking enough!

The majority of times when you talk to an older person, they will say “IF I was your age, I WOULD be doing so and so….”, when I get older I will say “ WHEN I was your age, I WAS doing so and so…” I was there… very important.  Rich or poor when you’re laying in bed as an old man, the only thing that you have are your memories or regrets!

Leo F. Buscaglia, an American author also known as "Dr. Love," perfectly describes what I am trying to transmit: “The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing, and becomes nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn and feel and change and grow and love and live.”

Nesrin was concerned that I will lose my adventurous spirit by marrying her, but two years later I was able to convince her to marry me. After our marriage, at one point, I did become complacent and less bold but it did not last long. Nesrin cracked the whip and got me back on my feet. She said “I need to see the fire in your eyes that I fell in love with!  We can lose and rebuild again, just do not stop taking risks."

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15 Comments
Isabela Fraga
11/27/2012 07:22:07 am

Mauchy im proud to be your daughter. I can take risks because of you and mama!

Reply
Isabela
11/27/2012 07:24:11 am

Mauchy I am proud to be your daughter. I can take risks because of you and mama!

Reply
Mario link
11/27/2012 12:02:07 pm

Isabela, best comment ever

Reply
mauricio
11/28/2012 09:39:52 am

Gracias mi amor.
We are! so proud of you.
Keep moving forward.

Reply
carlos fraga muirragui
11/28/2012 12:47:10 pm

Bravo Nasrin!!!
Tus pensamientos,con el transcurrir del tiempo,son las semillas ,que brotan en el campo familiar,haciendo crecer la comprensión,el entendimiento,la comunicación oportuna y constante a lo largo de la vida en común de los esposos y sus hijos,hasta llegar a tener una encina muy frondosa que con el tiempo proteja a la familia de
los riesgos que siempre están presentes cuando se emprende en algo nuevo.Y como contraparte,te llenan de valor y coraje para afrontarlos cuando se los toma en compañia .Y qué mejor compañera que la esposa ,para discutirlos,sopesarlos y finalmente aceptarlos. Así crece una familia!!!!! Leyendo tus comentarios y luego releerlos, entre líneas, a menudo se encuentra algo que sirve para la meditación del tema. La meditación,puedo creer que siempre llena el pensamiento y engrandece el corazón.
Bien por mis queridos sobrinos.Los dos son la aguja y el carrete,la cometa y su piola,el pan y la matequilla y por fin,ya hablando en serio,dos personas que con las otritas tres,son...inseparables en el amor, por sus conceptos que tienen de la vida y sus riesgos.
, Felicidades.

Reply
Mauricio
11/29/2012 08:28:40 am

Lindos pensamientos
Gracias

Reply
Alex
4/22/2013 04:49:20 am

I should accept your dinner invitation while i was giving you a ride at the middle of the night on Saturday, this part of your blog looks like you are directly talking to me, life is a collage and a learning process, i regret now, i was saying i wish i had good brief time with you that night, i need this kind of motivation and guidance, not because i am taking advantage of the time i shared with you, but as a principal your blog makes a lot of sense to me specially for those who came to USA as immigrant or in different way to change their life for better. Thank you and looking forward for more postings.

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Michael Tims link
4/2/2014 04:54:42 am

Mauricio,

I went to school in Thessaloniki with your wife. We met a while back. If you take complacency out of the picture, I wonder if it's easier for people to take risks when they have nothing to lose or when they have the financial cushion to risk losing? Anyway, thanks for your insights.

Michael

Reply
Nesrin Abaza
4/2/2014 06:59:36 am

Hello Michael,

I believe people who get comfortable have a fear of losing what they have, their comfort zone. On the other hand people who have very little also fear losing whatever little they have. Taking a risk is an internal self confidence that pushes you and says I believe in me! I may loose but I have the capability to rebuild!

Reply
Michael
4/2/2014 08:11:00 am

Are you the ghost writer Nesrin?

Michael Tims
4/2/2014 08:17:27 am

I think some people have an faith that every thing happens for a reason and in the end works out. Are they in a closer contact with source energy that connects us to the universe and each other, or is their attitude one of acculturation, a gift from their family. I ask not to debate or argue, simply I don't know and am curious what others think.

Nadia Hashem
4/2/2014 11:07:59 am

High Risk- simple High Reward.... More Power to you, your wonderful strong wife and beautiful family...God Bless you all!

Reply
Thabit Sawan
4/2/2014 11:09:13 am

Your article is full of courage and optimism. You are like the gardener, who put a seed in the ground, consistently tend it, confident to see the results, in time, of all nurture he have provided.

Reply
Derrick
4/15/2014 07:55:57 pm

Great of you!

That was a very fine piece!

Thanks for the inspiration.

Reply
Morella Sucre
4/2/2016 05:39:55 am

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    Who I am today as a person is largely due to my failures!
    Failures are the speed bumps in life that matter!  They are not regrets but small disappointments that wake up the strength within us! Failures are the process of learning and improving!  Without failures we simply are at a status quo!  

    "success is built on many failures..." 

    Mauricio Fraga-Rosenfeld

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