I Love Failure
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I Love Failure

It is essential, day by day,
to remain responsible
for our actions and decisions,
​accepting our faults
​without assigning blame


'Generation 1.5' - Deprived of Rights

9/6/2017

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‘Generation 1.5’ (G1.5) is used for people that were brought to the US at a young age, before adolescence by first generation immigrants; by immigrant parents that never really integrated, keeping close ties with their home countries and always dreaming of the day that they will be able to return to their native countries.
 
Since these immigrants never saw the US as their home, their kids, G1.5 is a generation who exist in limbo, between two nations, two cultures, with no clear identity.
 
Nesrin, my wife was a G1.5 kid, she arrived in her early teens to the US when her father was transferred to Washington, DC.  Like any other immigrant teenager, her adjustment to a whole new way of life was not easy, trying to conform while her parents still had a foot in there homeland.
 
The crazy part is that:
 
For the immigrants that entered in the US as undocumented, their children, their G1.5 offspring have a lot to overcome.
 
Despite having lived most of their lives in the US, having siblings born in the US and speak fluent English, many can not get working permits, get a drivers license, or vote. Just like any other undocumented migrant they are subject to arrest and deportation. They do not have the right to live in the great America.
 
What happens if they get deported? Many of them do not speak other than English and have no bond with their countries of origin. For them to be evicted is like being put-away, with no chance for parole.
 
It is insane to imagine that in this great country, a country built by immigrants, that a young person that was raised all his/her life here, has no rights and could be deported!
 
So, what can we do about it?
 
First, we must care!  America was and continues to be built by legal and illegal immigrants. They are industrial-entrepreneurial people willing to risk; people that are responsible for creating a resilient-America, an America that strives.
 
Because we care, we should advocate laws and candidates that support ‘generation 1.5’ to get a legal status.
 
We must speak up against ‘leaders’ that have an irrational fear of people from different countries, cultures or religion; we must stand up to these bigoted honchos that believe that their opinion is superior then any regular mortal.
 
Most importantly we should view ‘generation 1.5’ as an asset rather than a liability, an investment rather than a cost. The majority is not here to collect social benefits, but they here to learn, to find work and to improve their lives and those of their families.
 
In the same way as my beautiful ‘G1.5 wife’ did! 
​
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​DARKNESS

9/4/2017

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All my life, I have been dealing with depression. As a teenager, I was able to camouflage it by being extremely extroverted, partying and drinking with ‘friends’. Well, this cover did not last for long; in my late teens, I moved away from home to a different country, to a different culture, to a place where I could not even speak the language. There, for the first time, I had to deal alone with my issues.
 
Alone in a different country, not having a scape route, I had to learn about my depression. At night, I would sit alone on the floor of my room, (didn’t own any furniture), and cry, and cry. I would work as a laborer during the day and then come home, broke, alone and depressed.
 
Slowly, I began to learn about myself; how stupid I had been and how my reality was not a good reality. With time I learned to manage my depression; when I say “with time”, I mean it that it took me years to really understand my brain. But now at 50, I believe that I have a ‘good grip’ of myself.
 
So, I would like to share how I managed to climb out of the ditch:
 
First, I put down all my guards. Any shield, any wall that was protecting me, I put it down. It was not easy; actually, it was one of the hardest things I had ever done. My defensive mechanism was to always be around people drinking, smoking and ‘having fun’; I was always shielded, I was never alone.
 
Then, I had to accept, that I did not care about other people; I was self-absorbed and I was there just to be entertained.

And finally, the toughest one: I do have plenty of mental issues and I had to learn to deal with them.
 
I never reached out for help or any type of medicine, which I think was one of my biggest errors.  Although, I did learn to peace my mind by exercising, reading and finding healthy people to be around me.
 
Now, I use this guideline:

  • STOP, step back and self-reflect: don’t allow depression to take over your mind. Find the root of those feelings. 
  • Allow yourself to be sad: sadness is good; it allows you to think clearly and focus. Allow sadness to be a temporary stage.
  • Find a quick release mechanism: for me writing has become my best phyicologist, it allows me to put my thoughts and pains on paper. Also, a good jog will make it, an inspirational TED talk, or a motivational book.
  • Find people better than you: when I say better than you, I mean find empathetic people that would understand what you are going through and willing to slog along.
  • ACT, which is the most important: when you are beginning to crash, take action and move along quickly. To stand still is to allow sorrow to occupy your soul. Actions builds strength, creates momentum, energy!
 
Darkness is something that has always encircled me; it is a part of my mind and soul so I am always attentive to it. It has been a fifty-year relationship and like any relationship, with time we learn to understand each other. The times when it becomes too dark or too cold, I quickly light a candle or if I need it, the fireplace.
 

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    Who I am today as a person is largely due to my failures!
    Failures are the speed bumps in life that matter!  They are not regrets but small disappointments that wake up the strength within us! Failures are the process of learning and improving!  Without failures we simply are at a status quo!  

    "success is built on many failures..." 

    Mauricio Fraga-Rosenfeld

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