While walking in DC a friend approached me “Mauricio, I have been thinking about this concept of failure…”
“Tell me about it,” I replied
“You know, I am in a deadfall, I feel depressed and do not have any idea where to begin and how to climb out of this hole”
After a few seconds I replied: “Well my friend, you just need to focus in accomplishing one thing at a time… nothing else.”
Often our self-confidence is pounded; we lack motivation or do not have the confidence to move forward. At times, it's hard to get out of bed; we feel lost or defeated and we do not know how to get back on track… It happens to all of us!
So here is the question: How can I manage to come out of the hole, to build my courage and get my confidence back?
People do not realize that self-confidence works like a muscle, and, like any other muscle, in order to make it stronger, and increase endurance it must constantly be trained.
From my own experience, the best training method to build up self-confidence is by being willing to take action on a daily basis.
Daily-action stands for ‘every-day action.’ Day-to-day you must come up with a small action plan, a plan that you know that with enough effort you will be able to accomplish it.
Everyday, just push your fears aside and go for it, knowing that you will achieve your daily-plan. Then, next day come up with another action plan, achieve it and the third day achieve it again… By acting on your small daily-action plans, you will be moving forward step by step.
With time, these actions will build a positive momentum; your mind will start to envision successful results and these will re-enforce your confidence!
Rashid, my friend, a veteran from the air force has been living on the streets for years. For the past year he and I have built an amiable relationship. We talk about our internal battles, successes and flops and his time of service in Korea.
While sitting next to him on the sidewalk, and listening to his fears, I ask him “do you know how to read?”
He looked at me as if I was a moron and replied “who do you think I am, but of course!“
I smiled and asked him to wait for me, and then I thought to myself, “that sounded funny as if he was going somewhere.”
I drove to the bookstore and bought 2 copies of the same book. I returned to Rashid with the books:
“My friend, this is what I want you to do: every morning just read one chapter of the book, then you would feel that you accomplished something, slowly you will begin to build momentum and read 2, 3, and 4 chapters a day. Your self-confidence will build up step by step.
I got the same book, so we can talk about it”
Rashid looked at me with a twinkle in his eyes and smiled… “Thank you!”
“Remember, everyday one chapter at a time; don’t try to change your life at once… pasito a pasito (step by step in Spanish)”
Be mindful: By taking daily-action, you feel accomplished; as a result, your self-confidence will skyrocket! Just like a muscle, everyone is trainable!
Who I am today as a person is largely due to my failures!