Everyday, as a family, we have breakfast and dinner together. In the morning everyone is fresh and we talk about our schedule for the day. In the evening we discuss what we did in school, business, horseback riding, friends and so on... Normally, it tends to be the best time of the day.
A few nights ago, dinner was not that pleasant… I had just returned from a meeting and was excited to share the results with my family. When we sat at the dinner table there were 10 different arguments, criticisms, complaints, taking place at the same time. At the end I lost my temper and yelled at everyone! Dinner was over and everyone left the table irritated. When I went to bed, I thought to myself what happened? How can an opportunity to have a great moment with my family become such a FAILURE?
Something that we are doing is wrong and we need to change it! We need to reinvent our gatherings as a family!
The dictionary defines to reinvent as to do something again, from the beginning, especially in a needless or inefficient effort, to transform, to arrive at a fresh phase.
If you do not like something, you have to change it! In order to change something you must first ask yourself, “Why am I allowing this to happen? What am I doing that is not working?”
I came across this article 5 Stepts to Reinvent Yourself: “Change means reinvention. Each time a major shift happens in our lives—leaving a job or a relationship, moving, losing a loved one—we have to take control of who we will become or risk never reaching our full potential”
As I was writing this blog a friend of mine called me for advice. He wants to make a major change in his life but he is hesitant. Two years ago he got involved in a business that he thought would thrive and unfortunately has just been one headache after another.
I have been telling him to cut his losses, get out and make a drastic change. He has a lot going for him, smart, young and energetic. His current business is sucking the air out him and if he does not change it will get worse. A change of scenery, a new market and he will regain all his excitement once more!
Personally, I had been in similar business situations myself. I made the mistake of staying too long in a business that was not going to improve. Despite the fact that I saw there was no light at the end of the tunnel. It is important to be consistent and have the perseverance to make something work, but as important know when to move on and cut your losses.
Successful people do not complain instead they take action and adjust! When they see something is not working they reinvent themselves fast.
So I needed to reinvent our dinner hour fast! I created a card game from post its. Each member of our family gets a card; all the cards direct you to do something. The statements on the cards are; Do not complain, control your temper, give a complement, do not criticize, talk about your day, share a new idea, sing a song, what are your dreams…
Yesterday, at dinner we talked about our “dinner game”, my kids made fun of me but we had a great time… no fights, criticisms or complaints. If we continue playing this game first, we will have fun, second, with time, these thoughts will become part of our daily habits.
"People who cannot invent and reinvent themselves must be content with borrowed postures, secondhand ideas, fitting in instead of standing out." Warren G. Bennis
Who I am today as a person is largely due to my failures!