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I Love Failure

This is a platform dedicated to show how great things result from failures!

MAURICIO FRAGA-ROSENFELD

Waiting for the Right Moment

12/8/2017

4 Comments

 
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A young man has been carrying a telephone number of a girl he likes for many years; he is a shy young man with some type of a speech impediment and a slight stutter.

While sitting with him I listened as he talked about this girl. I told him, “today you are going to call her, what are you waiting for?”

It took few minutes of motivation and finally he agreed to call her:

Ring, ring... ring, ring...
“hello” a man answered the phone. It sounded like her father
“May I speak with María?”
“María” the man on the other side replied 
“Who is this? Is this a prank call” clearly annoyed...
“No, no” with a nervous tone “this is George a friend of hers...”
After a few seconds of silence, the father continued “María died two years ago...”


This young man felt the shock as if he had been hit with a bat; he was not prepared or ever imagined the death of his beloved. In his mind, he had created a life with Maria and today everything that he dreamed of just got demolished, it all came crashing down in pieces.
The sadness in his eyes and the pain was so profound... I could not hold myself and I brooke out in tears.
 

He had been carrying this phone number in his pocket for years waiting for the right moment.

__ I woke up with tears in my eyes, with a feeling of emptiness, sadness... what a powerful dream!
​I thought to myself, "how many of us have been in a similar situation, in situations where we waited for too long, missed opportunities, never knowing what would of happened if we only called”


Keep in mind: 
Life is what happens to us while working a plan to live 
Life is not a matter of waiting for the right moment to act because it will never be the right time. 
Life is about living, getting up and going for it!

It was not a happy dream but it was a good reminder. Thank you!

4 Comments

Get Going Strong

11/1/2017

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LACK OF CONFIDENCE...

10/30/2017

2 Comments

 
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When you lack confidence, focus in accomplishing one thing at a time… nothing else!
 
Often our self-confidence is pounded; we lack motivation or do not have the confidence to move forward. At times, it's hard to get out of bed; we feel lost or defeated and we do not know how to get back on track… It happens to all of us!
 
So here is the question: How can I manage to come out of the hole, to build my courage and get my confidence back?
 
People do not realize that self-confidence works like a muscle, and, like any other muscle, in order to make it stronger, and increase endurance it must constantly be trained.
 
From my own experience, the best training method to build up self-confidence is by being willing to take action on a daily basis.
 
Daily-action stands for ‘every-day action.’ Day-to-day you must come up with a small action plan, a plan that you know that with enough effort you will be able to accomplish it.
 
Everyday, just push your fears aside and go for it, knowing that you will achieve your daily-plan. Then, next day come up with another action plan, achieve it and the third day achieve it again… By acting on your small daily-action plans, you will be moving forward step by step.
 
With time, these actions will build a positive momentum; your mind will start to envision successful results and these will re-enforce your confidence!
 
Be mindful: By taking daily-action, you feel accomplished; as a result, your self-confidence will skyrocket!  Just like a muscle, everyone is trainable!

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'Generation 1.5' - Deprived of Rights

9/6/2017

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‘Generation 1.5’ (G1.5) is used for people that were brought to the US at a young age, before adolescence by first generation immigrants; by immigrant parents that never really integrated, keeping close ties with their home countries and always dreaming of the day that they will be able to return to their native countries.
 
Since these immigrants never saw the US as their home, their kids, G1.5 is a generation who exist in limbo, between two nations, two cultures, with no clear identity.
 
Nesrin, my wife was a G1.5 kid, she arrived in her early teens to the US when her father was transferred to Washington, DC.  Like any other immigrant teenager, her adjustment to a whole new way of life was not easy, trying to conform while her parents still had a foot in there homeland.
 
The crazy part is that:
 
For the immigrants that entered in the US as undocumented, their children, their G1.5 offspring have a lot to overcome.
 
Despite having lived most of their lives in the US, having siblings born in the US and speak fluent English, many can not get working permits, get a drivers license, or vote. Just like any other undocumented migrant they are subject to arrest and deportation. They do not have the right to live in the great America.
 
What happens if they get deported? Many of them do not speak other than English and have no bond with their countries of origin. For them to be evicted is like being put-away, with no chance for parole.
 
It is insane to imagine that in this great country, a country built by immigrants, that a young person that was raised all his/her life here, has no rights and could be deported!
 
So, what can we do about it?
 
First, we must care!  America was and continues to be built by legal and illegal immigrants. They are industrial-entrepreneurial people willing to risk; people that are responsible for creating a resilient-America, an America that strives.
 
Because we care, we should advocate laws and candidates that support ‘generation 1.5’ to get a legal status.
 
We must speak up against ‘leaders’ that have an irrational fear of people from different countries, cultures or religion; we must stand up to these bigoted honchos that believe that their opinion is superior then any regular mortal.
 
Most importantly we should view ‘generation 1.5’ as an asset rather than a liability, an investment rather than a cost. The majority is not here to collect social benefits, but they here to learn, to find work and to improve their lives and those of their families.
 
In the same way as my beautiful ‘G1.5 wife’ did! 
​
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​DARKNESS

9/4/2017

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All my life, I have been dealing with depression. As a teenager, I was able to camouflage it by being extremely extroverted, partying and drinking with ‘friends’. Well, this cover did not last for long; in my late teens, I moved away from home to a different country, to a different culture, to a place where I could not even speak the language. There, for the first time, I had to deal alone with my issues.
 
Alone in a different country, not having a scape route, I had to learn about my depression. At night, I would sit alone on the floor of my room, (didn’t own any furniture), and cry, and cry. I would work as a laborer during the day and then come home, broke, alone and depressed.
 
Slowly, I began to learn about myself; how stupid I had been and how my reality was not a good reality. With time I learned to manage my depression; when I say “with time”, I mean it that it took me years to really understand my brain. But now at 50, I believe that I have a ‘good grip’ of myself.
 
So, I would like to share how I managed to climb out of the ditch:
 
First, I put down all my guards. Any shield, any wall that was protecting me, I put it down. It was not easy; actually, it was one of the hardest things I had ever done. My defensive mechanism was to always be around people drinking, smoking and ‘having fun’; I was always shielded, I was never alone.
 
Then, I had to accept, that I did not care about other people; I was self-absorbed and I was there just to be entertained.

And finally, the toughest one: I do have plenty of mental issues and I had to learn to deal with them.
 
I never reached out for help or any type of medicine, which I think was one of my biggest errors.  Although, I did learn to peace my mind by exercising, reading and finding healthy people to be around me.
 
Now, I use this guideline:

  • STOP, step back and self-reflect: don’t allow depression to take over your mind. Find the root of those feelings. 
  • Allow yourself to be sad: sadness is good; it allows you to think clearly and focus. Allow sadness to be a temporary stage.
  • Find a quick release mechanism: for me writing has become my best phyicologist, it allows me to put my thoughts and pains on paper. Also, a good jog will make it, an inspirational TED talk, or a motivational book.
  • Find people better than you: when I say better than you, I mean find empathetic people that would understand what you are going through and willing to slog along.
  • ACT, which is the most important: when you are beginning to crash, take action and move along quickly. To stand still is to allow sorrow to occupy your soul. Actions builds strength, creates momentum, energy!
 
Darkness is something that has always encircled me; it is a part of my mind and soul so I am always attentive to it. It has been a fifty-year relationship and like any relationship, with time we learn to understand each other. The times when it becomes too dark or too cold, I quickly light a candle or if I need it, the fireplace.
 

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GIVING

8/31/2017

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If you want people to listen to you, share your knowledge.
If you want friends and family to care about you, treasure them.
If you want to grow your business, help those around you grow theirs.
 
By giving, you enhance your relationships with others, build trust, but most importantly, you make a difference in someone else’s life; you make others feel better about themselves and their lives.
 
Always keep in mind: The more you give, the more generous you are, the more joy you feel; helping others is the key to achieving happiness.
​

1 Comment

How could I?

7/30/2017

1 Comment

 
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Writing has become my personal psychologist. Every time I feel a little lost, I put my thoughts on paper and then voilà: my mind clears and my garbage despairs.
 
Today, I decided to try something different and pen a poem:
 
   How could I
   How could I feel misplaced,
   in a town that I identify so well?
   How could I feel apart,
   with a family so tight together?
   How could I feel sad,
   when so much hope is in my heart?

 
After writting, I always feel accomplished!



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WILLPOWER: Intention & Determination

6/15/2017

4 Comments

 
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If I could only build a stronger willpower, I would eat healthier, I would exercise regularly, I would quit smoking or drinking, I would stop procrastinating and ultimately I would accomplish my goals!
 
I do know that my lack of commitment and drive is what keeps me on stand by, hopping for something to happen. I do comprehend that in order to improve my existence I must build a stronger willpower.
 
Willpower is the key, so what does it mean?
 
'Will' is the ability to make conscious choices. We all have a free will to make our own choices, good or bad. Plants do not have will and animals have some amount of will. Yet, humans have the greatest amount of will. Humans are able to think analytically and make informed choices.
 
‘Power’ is energy, it is the force and the strength required to sustain physical or mental activity.
 
‘Will-Power’ means to have the will to exercise power.
Willpower is the ability to control oneself and determine one's actions; it means to have a firmness of will. Willpower is to have self-discipline, to moderate emotions and to control actions.
 
Every time time you make a decision you practice some level of self-control; what to order for lunch, whether to go to the gym or have a glass of wine. All the decisions are directly related to your will power, to your mental energy.
 
A person with strong willpower will keep going even in the face of strong resistance; a person with little willpower will easily give in.
 
How do we build a strong willpower?
 
Willpower works like a muscle: to strengthen it, you need to train mentally and physically, and constantly nurture it. 

Next, I have listed a few simple ways to help you maintain and build your mental-power:
 
Drink More Water: Lack of water damages your mental abilities, affects your mood and reduces your mind power. Our mistake is to confuse thirst for hunger. When you feel exhausted, first, reach for a glass of water before grabbing a snack. 
A brain is like a sponge and dehydration parches it, shrinks it. Drink water before drying your brain, keep it saturated! Always keep in mind the term: ‘dry brain’
 
Eat Healthy, Get Ret Rid of The Junk: Nutrition is key for proper brain functioning. To keep your mind sharp and to maintain self-control, your brain cells require glucose, sugar. When glucose is low, you can’t focus and your brain looks for immediate rewards.
Create a habit of eating continuously small portions during the day; balanced meals that have a significant amount of protein and fiber.  This will keep you with the energy you need and your brain won’t starve for junk food.
 
Get Plenty of Sleep: Sleepiness slows down your thought processes, impairs memory and makes learning difficult; it alters your mood, causing irritability and anger. When you are tired, your judgment, reaction time and awareness are significantly impaired.
Make as a priority to sleep 6 to 8 hours per day; a priority to rest!
 
Learn to Breathe: When breathing correctly our bodies are supplied with the right amount of oxygen. Oxygen is energy that recharges our brain and our vital organs; a boost of energy needed to power everything we do, from moving to thinking to growing.
When breathing properly we reduce stress and our bodies release endorphins. Endorphins are feel-good, natural painkillers created by our own bodies.
 
_Keep in mind: Developing strong willpower won’t happen overnight. It takes time and repetition to establish purposeful habits; a strong willpower will keep you committed to follow through; Intention without determination is of little avail!

"Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will." - Mahatma Gandhi
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Hire People Smarter than You!

6/14/2017

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Hire people brighter than you and then get out their way; allow them to try, fail and succeed!

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#1 Reason for Failure is Procrastination.

5/30/2017

1 Comment

 
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Procrastination comes from lack of motivation, lack of discipline, poor management habits, lack of skill or seeking perfection; in reality they are just excuses for nonperformance.  

Keep in mind:  The #1 reason for failure is Procrastination.  
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    Who I am today as a person is largely due to my failures!
    Failures are the speed bumps in life that matter!  They are not regrets but small disappointments that wake up the strength within us! Failures are the process of learning and improving!  Without failures we simply are at a status quo!  

    "success is built on many failures..." 

    Mauricio Fraga-Rosenfeld

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