If you want to be an entrepreneur, but you can’t handle a 16 hour workday, then your enterprise won’t make it far. How much sacrifice are you willing to tolerate? If you want to be a writer, but aren’t willing to accept criticism, then you shouldn’t even start. How much rejection are you able to handle? If you want to be a great athlete, but can’t stand to lose, then I have bad news for you. How much defeat are you willing to deal with? Like your parents have told you plenty of times: “Everything worth having involves sacrifice and persistence.” Nothing comes easy; not marriage, not family, not education, not work, not your dreams or passions. Life is not easy; yet, for those who have the strength and courage to follow trough, life is fun and great! Got it? _Now, if you are one of those people with 'big-dreams,' how do you reach into your strength to maximize your resilience? When you have an aspiration, first you must truly believe in it; you must see yourself succeeding in it, this is crucial! Then, you must have a plan, a plan of action and lastly, you act on your plan! A dream without action will always remain a dream. So you act on it, yet keep in mind: Almost 100% of the time the initial plan will not work as you expected and you may fail. Another must, it is vital when your plan fails, that you go back to the drawing board and work on a new plan. Never forgetting your dream, your aspiration, and goal. Then, you take action one more time knowing that your plan might fail once again, and again, and again… For your plan to succeed, you need to have the determination and the courage to continue in spite of all the difficulties. Most importantly, you need to be resilient and have the ability to bounce back quickly, reinventing yourself. Always aiming towards your goal. Ultimately when you are dealing with defeat, always keep in mind having the right attitude makes the difference between success and failure. A positive attitude leads to affirmative thoughts, constructive events and successful outcomes; it generates happiness and satisfaction. The right attitude is what it takes to succeed!
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It is hard to keep up with all the terrible attacks happening all over the world. Every morning when you open your browser, you read about a new bombing, stabbing, shooting, executions, and terror attacks… All caused because of “religion and race’ Wow… bad religion, bad race Well, here is my thought: A few individuals have managed to use religion or race as an excuse to take humanity as a hostage. We cannot blame religion or race for the terrible things happening around the world. Neither one supports this brutality. We need to understand that all these acts are never about religion or race. They are about people using them as an excuse for violence; they are about keeping people divided, keeping people scared and easy to be controlled. It is not religion or race that makes people good or evil; it is only their actions. Vicious animals, weak individuals, closed minded people that do not respect another human being despite what they “believe in.” And, this is what I believe in: Passiveness is not an option anymore; it is time to act together with conviction to put a stop to these extremist-fanatics! The day we stay silent about things that matter, we become submissive, it is the day that we are done! Someday when I am ready I will speak up.
Someday when I am ready I will ask her to marry me. Someday when I am ready I will change careers. Someday when I am ready I will follow my passion. Someday when I am ready I will find a purpose. Someday is a word that keeps us safe from harm; it’s a word that verifies that we are actually going to do something about our dreams; a word that makes us feel good, knowing that one day we will accomplish our goals. In reality, someday is a terrible word; it’s a word that manages to destroy our dreams and to slowly demolish our will. It’s a word that we use to keep us stuck and powerless by shifting our attention away from what truly matters; our purpose! In fact, someday is a disguise for procrastination, a screen for our lack of motivation and lack of discipline. It’s a word that is used to postpone taking action or to drift! Someday is an excuse for inaction! So: Stop looking for excuses for why you can't have what you want and understand that SOMEDAY is TODAY. That today, not tomorrow, is the day to act. Do not wait for it to happen, do not hope for your dream to occur, make it happen knowing that a dream without action will remain a dream forever! Someday Starts Today! Tonight, before dropping my 14-year-old daughter at a party, I sat down with her and her friends for a quick pep talk.
“I want to give you all some advice: First, do not allow peer pressure to control your decisions. Reputation is something that you build for life, good or bad, it stays with you forever; take care of it. Anything that you post on the web will never disappear; be smart when you decide to share a picture or to post a thought. Drugs are evil, stay away from them. Finally, you all are beautiful, always act like a lady and respect yourself!” Every Tuesday we have a management meeting; two hours where we talk about company issues, procedures and future events. This is the time where I have the chance to talk to all the leadership in my company, to listen to and to get them excited. Looking around at our team, I realized that I had people from all over the world except for locals, natives. In fact, I was the only one there born in the U.S. the rest are from India, Pakistan, Thailand, Morocco, Jordan, Ethiopia, Peru, Mongolia, Korea, England and Ecuador. OOF, that is a mouthful of countries… All these nationalities under one roof, living in America made me think of an essay that Isabela, my 14 year old daughter, wrote for school a few days ago: The American Dream by Isabela Fraga-Abaza The American Dream is real depending on a person's view of life and what they see for themselves. This is different for everyone, and does not have a specific definition. The American Dream is genuinely thought to be the idea that everyone is equal and everyone has the same opportunities of success. To some, mansions, fancy cars and unlimited money, define the American Dream but to others it can be waking up in a safe place not terrorized by war and other dangers; for them it is to have the opportunity and a chance for a better life knowing it will not be an easy goal. The American Dream can be real for people coming from terrorized areas. If people from these areas live in the fear of being killed or imprisoned everyday, they don't have enough energy to focus on the things that matter like family. Everyday people deal with terrorism in their own way. An example is this family from Baghdad, they were very poor and one day they started receiving text messages saying, “Give us money, or we will burn down your house. If you tell the police, we will kill you.” The family was very poor and they couldn't get the money. They kept receiving those text messages, but they thought maybe the terrorists were lying and that the messages would eventually stop. Then one day they woke up in the middle of the night to their house on fire. Fortunately they got all their kids out of the house. The family received another text saying, “Give us money, or this time you will die.” The family decided, “they’d rather die in a plastic boat than die there.” There are many stories like this. People in these situations usually come to the US because they won't have to worry about these kinds of things, but it does not guarantee that things like this won't happen. The police and government in the US aren't as corrupt. Even if things like this happen you have more sources and rights. The law is above everyone! Economic inequality does have an effect on the American Dream. It can depend on what opportunities your family can provide for you, as well as the education you receive. A child growing up in poverty is likely to face more challenges than a child growing up in a wealthy family. The Caste System is a great example of economic inequality because people are usually born into the various social classes of the caste system. It is very hard to move up to another social class and people are not allowed to have relationships with other classes. The class a person is in defines their job which then defines their economic status. Outside of a Caste System it is possible to overcome economic hardship. My father is an example of this. He left Ecuador when he was 19 and came to America with only 600 dollars in his pocket. He worked 2 manual labor jobs per day until he could afford and got accepted to a Community College where he got a scholarship to continue at American University. He did not complete the last semester because he was trying to follow his dreams of starting his own business. Today my father is a successful business owner and believes in the American Dream. Although the American dream worked for him, this is not the case for everyone. Citizenship in the US, which the government has a big influence on, can affect a person’s ability to achieve the American Dream. It can also affect your ability to get good housing, a job, health insurance, college education and it could lead to deportation. If a noncitizen or immigrant comes to the U.S. there is no guarantee they will obtain a job. Certain paperwork must be filed to work as a noncitizen, and it includes a $340.00 fee. But even then it is not guaranteed that this paperwork will go through. The same challenges are faced when trying to become a citizen or when trying to achieve the American Dream. Unfortunately when people come to the U.S., they are not aware of all these challenges. They may be coming from poverty thinking they might get a well paying job to support themselves and their family. Once they come to the U.S. they realize it is not as easy as they thought. Xenophobia is a big struggle for immigrants. The government should stop portraying immigrants as a bad thing and more as an essential part of society. In many cases immigrants do the jobs no one else is willing to do, that people take for granted. The government should also help more with jobs, because the only jobs immigrants can usually do are jobs that don't require paperwork. Those jobs are usually paid at below minimum wage. It is also hard to get a working visa here and good education. The fee to apply for a working visa should be lowered because even if this amount is paid it doesn't necessarily mean a person will get approved. The government can make immigrants eligible for in state tuitions in all states, and getting rid of language barriers because that is a big struggle for immigrants who come to the U.S. and want an education. Even though it is hard to come to the States, the American Dream can be real depending on how it is viewed. It is a struggle but it’s not impossible. The worry of terrorism is not as bad as other places and people can trust police more other countries. Even if someone is born into poverty here it is not impossible to get out of it, unlike people who live in the Caste system or similar circumstances. Education may also be a struggle because of the cost and language barrier, which the government should get more involved with. The American Dream is depended upon what a person sees for himself or herself. - Isabela's essay taught me 2 lessons: One, all of us have the capacity to create our own destiny, our own reality; our fate depends on our intention and the capacity to accomplish it. Two, people immigrate to the United States, leaving everything behind, their family and friends, their culture and possessions, because they have hope, hope for a better life! They do not come to beg for the social benefits; they come to find work and to improve their lives and those of their families. At our company I see our people from all over the world that work hard, pay taxes and obey the law. They left everything behind to better their lives and their loved ones; they left everything in search of the American Dream! If your first plan fails, try a second one, and then try a third and a fourth…
This temporary defeat shows that your plan is not sound, that something is wrong. So, keep tweaking it until you manage to put together the right plan! Do not give up, stay persistent, find the right formula. ‘A plan is worthless unless you have the determination and persistence to make it work!’ Mauricio Fraga-Rosenfeld Today I was picking some t-shirts for a project that I am working on. Like always, I was a little behind schedule; the cashier was taking her time folding them… I tried to grab some of the shirts to help her but she stopped me by saying “I will be finished soon, this is a process…” Her comment made me think about the word ‘process…’ First let’s find out what is the meaning of the word process? A process is a series of actions taken in order to achieve a particular end; a series of steps and decisions required to complete a task. - All too often, we focus on the end results. We see success as a single event to be achieved. Yet, if we stop and think about our achievements and failures we will realize that is not the result of an event, but a string of them that made the difference; a run of right or wrong actions, a set of processes. We may not realize it, but processes are everywhere and in every aspect of our lives. Everyone that thrives, athletes, families, business are committed to the process. A process is procedure that is constantly repeated until it becomes an automatic response, until it becomes a habit; a new behavior. Successful people are committed to the daily practice, not the individual event. They understand that processes are Key! At the end I was taught a good lesson... the cashier took her time folding the t-shirts following a process that allowed her to perform with accuracy. Today, I went to get an infusion at an oncology center. Every few months I get an iron IV to bring up my levels.
Anyway, this morning I had to be there for 6 hours, watching people coming and going getting their IV’s. The majority of the people were there for chemotherapy; all full of hope, all on an endeavor to make a change, to shock their systems and improve their health. Some of them seemed to be in good shape and wining the battle, while others seemed to be struggling, with shortness of breath, feeling weak and no energy. During my visit I was looking at the chairs getting constantly used, like being on a subway, as soon as somebody gets up the seat is rapidly taken. This experience made me think about my own life. A few years ago I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer, fortunately it was detected at an early stage and everything was taken care. Yet, part of me could relate to them, not knowing what would happen to me, thinking about my wife crying, waiting for the results, thinking about my young kids… Remembering how my life came to a halt. Yet today, I was there just for an infusion, a tune up, while the majority was there to survive, fighting for their lives. Glazing at this situation gave me a different perspective about my life and my personal issues. These past weeks have been challenging. Some times, I just want to turn around and say “that is it, I am done,” yet, after looking at all these people I clearly see that I do not have anything to complain about. I am healthy, with a beautiful family, working on my passions: building ideas, writing and giving people a different perspective on life. So, here is a thought: It is easy to complain and to find a reason to feel sorry about our lives… However, next time when you are frustrated and ready to feel petty about yourself, think about other’s misfortunes and difficulties, or better, go visit a homeless shelter or stop by an oncology department at a hospital. This will help you to put your life into perspective and to realize how easy you have it, how fortunate you are and how foolish you will feel complaining. One more thing: Your health is your most precious possession. You can’t put a value on a healthy mind and body; take care of both, do not take them for granted. At home every night we have dinner together as a family. We have only one rule: no cell phones on the table. It is an hour where we talk about our day, our events, our problems, business ideas, school projects, and so on. It is the moment for an open forum. It is open mic time! Everyone has equal opportunity to talk about any subject. During this time we learn, we laugh, we argue… and have a great time as a family.
Lately however, we have been having more arguments then anything else. We all have different situations happening in our lives, ‘stress'; school, college, business, boyfriends, girlfriend and so on… The fact of the matter is that our dinner hour has become more as an obligation than an hour to wind down. So here is a thought for all of us at home: Today, I decided to take over and change the situation, to grab the bull by the horns. As of tonight the rules have changed.
Always keep in mind, that at home, dinner is the most important event of the day that is meant to be enjoyed! Please make a conscious effort to keep it like that. As a Latino and as an American citizen, it is difficult to understand how candidates for the United States Presidency are using xenophobia against the Latino community to win votes. Being an immigrant myself, I believe that any person who comes to live permanently in a foreign country, no matter their background or ethnicity has plenty of courage and determination. When people decide to move, they pack up not only all their possessions, but life as they know it; leaving behind their comfort zone, their family, their friends, and their culture. In reality, the only thing that migrants carry with them is hope; hope for a better life! After leaving everything, an immigrant arrives to his new home… scared but full of dreams only to confront xenophobia. Legal or illegal, an immigrant has few opportunities; mostly, in order to survive they work jobs that you could never imagine and often their rights are violated. As an immigrant, you never close the circle; you never stop dreaming of the day that you will be able to re-unite with your family. Always, trying to maintain your culture, your principles while adapting to a new environment. Most of us do not come for social benefits; we come to find work and to improve our lives and those of our families. Although the reasons for having been pushed out of our homes are different for all of us like economic hardship, religious persecution, social intolerance, corrupted governments and more. We were all pulled in because of safety, stability and the opportunity to find a way to earn money to support our families. I lived this tale in my own flesh, so I know! So, here is my thought to all these candidates that have an irrational fear of people from different countries, cultures or religion; to these bigoted nominees that believe that their opinion is superior then any regular mortal. First lets understand the meaning of the word candidate: a candidate is a person who is applying for a job; a person who is trying to be considered for a position, to be chosen. Yes, every single one of you is auditioning for us; each one of you is applying to serve 321 million people, different people. Some are Black, some are white; some are Latinos and others are Asians. Some are straight and others are gay. Yet, all these dissimilar people live in one nation, the United States. Then, you are seeking to become the leader of a great country, a nation that has been built by immigrants. In fact, only 1.7 percent of the population can be considered native. The rest of us came from all over the world. To become a leader one must be sensitive to accept different perspectives and opinions, understanding backgrounds, ethnicity, religions and cultures. A good leader has to have the ability to inspire, to motivate, to build, to listen and to unite, not to destroy, not to divide, not to despise! The right leader knows that he/she is not the ruler or the center of the world; understands that every moment something exciting is happening all over the world; one world full of different inhabitants. Most importantly, Señores Candidatos, we all should view immigrants as an asset for this country rather than a liability. Like your parents and grandparents, all immigrants arrive scared but excited to their new environment. Their vision is not clouded and they will find opportunities where the locals can't see them anymore. The flavors, the colors, the sounds are new to them; they are like kids, everything is a new experience. Their mind is set, they have decided that they came to succeed and constantly seeking for opportunities and ways to improve themselves. They are willing to do the pitiful jobs because they know, that every job is only a step closer to accomplishing their dreams. We, as a nation, should view immigrants as an investment rather than a cost. Creating a system where we assist the right people to cross the border swiftly and legally. And everybody should make a conscious effort to better integrate immigrants within society. An immigrant is a great asset, a blessing for any country! Finally, if you really want to become the President of this great country, and lead the world; first you need to understand that you would be working for all 321 million, then, learn to listen and accept different perspectives and opinions. Finally, stop your xenophobic speeches by utilizing immigrants as pawns to win votes! |
Who I am today as a person is largely due to my failures! Archives
January 2024
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